The New Year's Resolutions I Can Stick By
You can, too! Join me!
5 min readJan 6, 2024
- Get rid of all my exercise equipment. So long elliptical! Via con diablos, workout videos I never watched!
- Limit myself to 100 steps a day. You gotta be more creative with your time, man. Make every step count!
- Go to bed by 1:30am, get up at 10am. I think this extra hour of daylight and DVR catching up will really help me feel more productive.
- Try a new candy at Rocket Fizz every day until I’ve tried them all. Some people cook through Julia Child’s Mastering the Art of French Cooking, and some of us have real goals.
- Give more of my patented, award winning relationship advice to all of you out there fucking it up for the rest of us.
- Tell more people, bad ideas, situations, distractions, and social norms to fuck off and eat a bag of dicks.
- Keep not buying a house.
- Continue to not give a shit about getting married. Marriage shouldn’t be a goal, having the best connection with an amazing and compatible partner should be a goal. (There’s some of that relationship advice for ya. Stop fucking it up)
- Get better at not giving a shit what anyone thinks about what I wear, do, eat, say, write, scream, buy, date, or how I spend my time. I love…
