Whip Appeal: Why She Has It
How you can get it and be your own elusive Cool Girl
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We all know someone just like her…
She’s the girl who has men offering her marriage proposals, her name tattooed across their backs, and the world on a silver platter.
The only trouble she seems to have in the love department is deciding which lucky guy will hold her purse while she’s in the dressing room, hold her hair back when she vomits, and would happily go to the drugstore at 2am to replenish her feminine hygiene supplies when she’s out.
No matter what she does, she has a ton of options and men seem to go nuts for her. Ask them to explain it and they’ll tell you they don’t even know why. Before they realize it, she’s stolen their hearts.
Often, she isn’t even amazingly attractive or overly sexually appealing. She may fall more along the lines of being average as far as looks go. If she isn’t your textbook definition of gorgeous, sexy or inviting, what exactly is it about her that drives men crazy?
Even though she’s average in looks, she’s off the charts in personality, essence and strength of character. This woman is few and far between.
She’s always taken and if she isn’t, she will be soon enough because the men around her just can’t help themselves. They have to have her. They trip over their own feet like fools, throwing themselves off the deep end.
Here’s why.
She has a great attitude
Despite what kind of lemons life throws at Miss “I Can Have Any Man I Want,” she remains optimistic, kind, and always has a smile on her face.
She doesn’t get worked up about the small things because for her, the overall picture is bright and cheerful. She knows her great attitude will turn a situation around in her favor.
You never hear her dwelling on shit that doesn’t matter. Instead, she’s focusing on how to solve her problems and those of others. The “glass half full” mentality is central to her beliefs and that’s why she’s “got it together.”
Men don’t want to be inundated with shitty attitudes, nastiness and venomous crap that seems rampant among a lot of women. Trade in the negative ish for something positive and watch your whole world change.
She’s humble, down to earth and unpretentious
This is the kind of girl you can talk to about anything, who understands being a good listener is enough to keep people around her inspired, especially men.
She isn’t out of touch with who she is because she pays attention to the needs of others. You won’t see her putting on a show to boost her reputation or acting like an attention whore who thinks she’s more important than anyone else. She’s not vain, vapid and superficial, trying to show off to impress strangers.
Her kindness isn’t a show she puts on in order to get something: connections, drinks, tickets, favors, gifts, attention, rungs up in social cliques, admiration, affection, companionship… it’s real and offered freely, not as a means to an end.
She knows the world doesn’t revolve around her. Her humility is something she takes pride in because she finds inspiration in giving. Men love that because it says she’s sensitive and caring.
She’s genuine out her accomplishments. You won’t see her embellishing her achievements to make them sound more grand than they are. She’s respectful, distinguished and gracious and has the spirit to treat people generously.
Mind you, she won’t over extend herself passing out charity like free lunch to losers who don’t deserve her kindness. Instead, she gives of herself only to people who have redeeming value and have proven they’re equally worthy of her investment.
She’s cool and fun
You always hear men say, “She’s a really Cool Girl.” He may say she isn’t even really “his type” but there’s just something about her that’s drawing him in and getting him hooked. Her “coolness” allows him to relax around her so much he isn’t afraid to open up and be himself.
On the flip side, they’ll often talk about all the other “psycho” hot women they usually go for, who fall way short as far as personality, culture and substance go.
Once they’ve found the “Cool Girl”, their lives and outlooks on women have changed forever and there’s no turning back. They’ve found what they want before they even knew what they were looking for.
The Cool Girl changes a man by showing him things he didn’t know existed. With her being cool and having a relaxed attitude towards people and life, he doesn’t have to wrestle with mountains of baggage to get inside her mind, nor does he have to grapple with how he should present himself.
Men respond enthusiastically to women who are authentic and carry themselves in a way that doesn’t clash with his need to reach out, be vulnerable and needed. We all seek a bond in a mate that’s much deeper than the more superficial one we’re used to with our friends and associates.
The Cool Girl facilitates his need to connect by being herself and not putting up fronts that don’t let him get past her exterior enough to connect. She also accepts him exactly as he is and might even like and celebrate who that is instead of trying to control or change him into something else.
In essence, the Cool Girl just “gets it”, whatever “it” may be to him.
She’s independent and loves her freedom to be who she is
Miss Thing is a free bird with nothing but the wind beneath her guiding her wherever she feels like landing and building a nest. She loves having good people in her life to help her figure things out along the way.
But it isn’t essential for her to have everyone on her side so she can feel protected and significant. She has an aura of autonomy that is precious to her. Her independence is part of what makes her the real woman she is.
She loves her freedom because it provides a life that’s fulfilling and doesn’t leave her chained to someone else’s ideals and aspirations. Instead, men follow her and her dreams because they’re void of codependency, neediness, and mis-identification.
She doesn’t use people as stepping stones, arm candy, romantic trophies or social klout. She has well-established, sincere, true friendships with other authentic men and women of the same calibur.
She knows who she is and who she wants to share her life with. She’ll wait patiently and earnestly for the right man to come along who’ll compliment her in every way.
An independent woman is a woman who’s confidence, secure and at ease with who she is. To men, this attribute is irresistible.
Women have gross misconceptions that being hot, sexy and hairless is what’s going to inspire a man to hang around.
They buy all the girly magazines and women’s journals telling them how to perfect their swiveling hips in the reverse cowboy position, or how much lip gloss they should wear when giving killer blow jobs, but fail to mention anything about the importance of self-respect, kindness and human regard.
It’s about what you’ve got going on inside that’s the deciding factor on whether a man is going to stay or go. It always is. If there’s nothing mid-point or upstairs, they know it and they can’t latch themselves onto anything that’s void of structure.
Try working on your insides. That’s what counts. And pretty soon, the guys will be tripping over each other to get to you.
