The change in my shitty attitude had nothing to do with getting tons of attention from men. I was hunting for my next boyfriend instead of just enjoying getting to know a new person. Every guy I liked was going to be The One and when they weren’t I decided there were no good men left in the world, they were all taken, they were all immature douchebags, etc. I had to choose to stop believing those things were true. I can’t control who approaches or messages me, I can only control how personally I take it and how I react to it. Once I did that dating stopped feeling like a hideous, soul sucking chore, and is sometimes even fun.

If I based my attitude on my experiences then it would still be shitty, as 98% of my dating experiences/attention given to me have been shitty/unwanted. If you decide dating is shitty, it will be. If you decide the world is against you, it will be. If you decide everyone is a superficial asshole that’s all you’re going to see. As with anything, it was far easier to blame everyone else than take any responsibility for what I was contributing to my situation.

I’m not single because guys don’t want to nail/date me, but because I haven’t found a guy I want to nail/date. My change in attitude didn’t suddenly send tons of guys I’m interested in my way, but it sure made me hate dating less and take it less seriously. Tony Robbins is successful for a reason.

Written by

Weird Girl, thrift store owl collector, heartbreaker, lush, aspiring adult. IG: DocJohnnyFever

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