If You’re Going to Dump Someone, Do It Over the Phone

Katie Dutch — used with permission

We want to believe the best way to break up with someone is to sit down with them face-to-face and have an honest, open discussion about why you feel the relationship should no longer continue.

After a calm, mature discussion you’ll both come to the amicable conclusion the relationship isn’t working for either of you. You’ll share a friendly hug and part ways saying, “I’m so glad we’re still friends.”

Can you tell me on what planet this actually happens? I’d like to go there. It sounds tranquil and civilized.

Oh, wait. My last relationship theoretically ended this way.

All my relationships have ended over the phone, save this one. Though I may have come to the conclusion I needed this break-up too, there was still crying, anger, and throwing things (when I was alone.) Histrionics are inevitable.

I’ve come to the conclusion face-to-face is the worst way to end a relationship.

It has nothing to do with maturity or respect, either. In fact, I feel it shows more maturity and respect to give the other person the dignity of not having to break down in front of you.

I’ve yet to experience a real “it was mutual” ending. It doesn’t exist. One person usually…