Attachment vs. Connection

Unhealthy attachment will kill promising connection every time

Niki Marinis
6 min readAug 1, 2022
Katie Dutch — used with permission

We’ve all met someone we felt an instant connection with. Like you’d known each other a lifetime. Things just flow. You might even feel like you knew them in another life.

I hear more stories than I can count where women feel a deep connection, it fizzles, he disappears, or things just don’t work out.

When this happens women struggle to let go. Sometimes months and even years go by, and they’re still holding on to the connection they felt.

Let me tell you how long I was hung up on the long-haired musician I was in love with in high school. Seven years. Girl, I had issues.

If you’re struggling to let go as I did, it isn’t connection. It’s attachment. And it’s your attachment that likely smothered and snuffed out this once budding connection.

Connection comes from the heart. Attachment comes from the mind. You attach through your thoughts, you connect through the heart.

Attachment takes us out of the moment

When you find yourself obsessed with thoughts of the past or the future when it comes to your relationships, you’re attached.

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Niki Marinis

Weird Girl, thrift store owl collector, heartbreaker, lush, aspiring adult. IG: DocJohnnyFever nikimarinis@gmail.com https://nikimarinis.medium.com/subscribe